where there was fear

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I feel like this is a little weird & twisty & I’m not sure it’s comprehensible, but what the heck… Here we go!

During the California Shelter in Place Carnival Ride, I’ve been trying to take some time to meditate and better understand my fears and anxieties surrounding COVID-19.

Something floated into my conscious thought today as I brought some age old memories forward into the light. In many things that I’ve read, seen and believe, there is a great call to kill or destroy the egos that propel us downward. Yet, in all religions and moralities around the world, is in not said “thou shalt not kill”? I know that seems ridiculous in that the subjects of death are not remotely the same, yet for me – today – it bears some thought.

I think perhaps that much of the reason we’re here is to identify our egos and seek to understand them. We need to dig deeply within when we see a recurring pattern in our lives – and discover the true “why” behind our actions. When we find within us a memory or feeling that brings us into a negative state, we have to reach out in compassion and acceptance. We have to envelop it in love in order to truly understand the way situations and circumstance took root in our minds as children, and continue to intrude upon us as a lens through which we view everything and everyone. Each of these, millions throughout our lives, is another lens – altering our perceptions even further. As we accept them with warmth and love, these lower vibrations begin to change. Where there was fear we begin to see courage. Love is the remedy and the trans-mutational device to raise your fears upward and out, to dissipate them in favor of their higher and opposite vibrations.

As I embrace the perfect little girl that was me, taking on the fear in my grandmother’s eyes as she struggled with pneumonia, I remind her that all is as it should be. I tap into The Universe, and I feel humanity’s cry for help. It feels like trying to veer away from a potentially horrific crash and knowing, confidently, that you’ll succeed, but it takes all your strength. It takes all of us. Praying, Wishing, Hoping – taking responsibility and taking action – to pull us all through this as best we can.

I believe in us.

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